20131122
I should remember this date, shouldn't I? November 22, 1963
We were living in Vienna 50 years ago. Dad was at a cocktail party, and as I recall, we kids (Kath, Peggy, Millie and I) were home. I was in the Study, the large room with the bay windows upstairs, where Dad had his desk, but it's also where we all sort of congregated when family events took place. I was lying on the sofa, half dozing, when Peggy came into the room and announced "Kenny's dead." I woke up and said, "No I'm not." She had actually said, "Kennedy's dead." That's how I found out.
Apparently Dad called home (we had 2 phones - one was in Mom & Dad's room, and the other in the hall downstairs). I hadn't heard it ring, but apparently Peggy (or maybe Kath) heard it ring, and got the news from Dad on the phone.
I'd never assume anything, but I don't think Kennedy's death affected Peggy to the point of tears. I recall that she was almost glad that SHE could tell ME about it. We were teenagers, and very competitive. So I wasn't surprised at her attitude --- that's if I remember this correctly. But there were definitely no tears on her part or on mine.
It was a somber time, however. I couldn't believe that such a thing could happen - to ANYone. It's the first public figure that I knew about (I had been for Kennedy in the election in 1960, which was not how my parents voted). I called my friends & they all seemed to know.
My scoutmaster said on the phone that he didn't think Kennedy's assassination was reason to cancel our planned scout overnight for the following weekend. My parents said it was up to me. My friend Matt came over, and we camped out in my back yard, rather than go with the scouts.
A lot of people I knew, or knew about died during our 4 years in Vienna: Matthew Ortwein's little brother, John F.Kennedy, Grandma Borg, Uncle Kenneth Borg, Schwester Baileul, Schwester Mika. I suppose this was the period in which I learned that death will come into my life, and I was not immune.
Friday, November 22, 2013
Thursday, November 21, 2013
DAY 3 - SOUL WRITING
20131121
SOUL writing has moved. I'm now using WORD to record my SOUL WRITING, since WORD has auto-correct, and this doesn't. So be it.
SOUL writing has moved. I'm now using WORD to record my SOUL WRITING, since WORD has auto-correct, and this doesn't. So be it.
Wednesday, November 20, 2013
DAY 2 - SOUL WRITING
20131120
This morning, I'm faced with a lot of different decisions & thoughts. For example:
1. Do I WRITE, or TYPE when I do soul writing?
2. WHERE do I soul write? Meaning in a blog? or in Word?
3. Do I meditate, and then write ABOUT the meditation (which today was FULL of thoughts and questions and ideas)? And THEN after that do the soul writing?
Or, is writing about my meditation actually soul writing?
*sigh*
Too many questions & not enough answers. Perhaps I'm over-thinking. I should just DO it. But I might as well do it at least CLOSE to the "right way" so I don't have to later regret starting something in an inferior way, and then changing it later for a better way.
RIGHT???
Story of my life with an analytical brain. And being a "good speller" and a stickler for grammar and punctuation (WHY, I don't really know), I will spend at least SOME of my soul writing energy correcting my typing.
Which makes me want to do this in Word, since Word will auto-correct, and that will save time.
On that basis, I hereby and now decree that my soul writing will be done in Word, and not here.
I will meditate for an hour, and then arise and type in Word (not here). This space will be for a blog - whatever THAT might mean for me in future times.
It's a LOT of writing:
1. Writing in my journal (which has been only now and then, sometimes with months between entries)
2. Writing my dream journal (which has also been very sparse)
3. Writing on exmormon.org (which has been sporatic, but perhaps at least weekly)
4. Writing on FaceBook (which has been minimal, but sometimes significant)
5. Writing blogs (which has also not been daily, and that's just fine with me. It's become sort of my journal.)
6. And now SOUL WRITING, which I hope will be DAILY, and will include 2 sections, with a possible 3rd section, all done in Word:
a. Meditation thoughts - only if there ARE any. I very well might sleep through the meditation hour. But if I don't, and if I have some significant thoughts that bear retention, I'll record thim in this section.
b. Dream journal - only if there WAS a dream during my sleep that I recall, and only if it's significant. I will record my dreams in my DREAM JOURNAL. It'll be easy to switch from my SOUL WRITING folder and my DREAM JOURNAL folder, since they're both Word documents.
c. Soul Writing, a new Word folder.
That's the plan, Stan. I'll do it today, and will copy yesterday's SOUL WRITING to the folder as my first day. Today is my 2nd day.
Fine, that's settled. I have all day today. I doubt I'll write all day, but I will try to give it "30 pages" like the author did (Janet Conner, whose book "Writing Down Your Soul" has inspired all this).
Hmmmm, when I read her first chapter, I had the thought that I should re-read it every day, to get her message better.
It's a good idea, but might get in the way of the real SOUL WRITING, so I'll do it today, but might not do it EVERY day. It depends on how it goes.
And here...we...go!
This morning, I'm faced with a lot of different decisions & thoughts. For example:
1. Do I WRITE, or TYPE when I do soul writing?
2. WHERE do I soul write? Meaning in a blog? or in Word?
3. Do I meditate, and then write ABOUT the meditation (which today was FULL of thoughts and questions and ideas)? And THEN after that do the soul writing?
Or, is writing about my meditation actually soul writing?
*sigh*
Too many questions & not enough answers. Perhaps I'm over-thinking. I should just DO it. But I might as well do it at least CLOSE to the "right way" so I don't have to later regret starting something in an inferior way, and then changing it later for a better way.
RIGHT???
Story of my life with an analytical brain. And being a "good speller" and a stickler for grammar and punctuation (WHY, I don't really know), I will spend at least SOME of my soul writing energy correcting my typing.
Which makes me want to do this in Word, since Word will auto-correct, and that will save time.
On that basis, I hereby and now decree that my soul writing will be done in Word, and not here.
I will meditate for an hour, and then arise and type in Word (not here). This space will be for a blog - whatever THAT might mean for me in future times.
It's a LOT of writing:
1. Writing in my journal (which has been only now and then, sometimes with months between entries)
2. Writing my dream journal (which has also been very sparse)
3. Writing on exmormon.org (which has been sporatic, but perhaps at least weekly)
4. Writing on FaceBook (which has been minimal, but sometimes significant)
5. Writing blogs (which has also not been daily, and that's just fine with me. It's become sort of my journal.)
6. And now SOUL WRITING, which I hope will be DAILY, and will include 2 sections, with a possible 3rd section, all done in Word:
a. Meditation thoughts - only if there ARE any. I very well might sleep through the meditation hour. But if I don't, and if I have some significant thoughts that bear retention, I'll record thim in this section.
b. Dream journal - only if there WAS a dream during my sleep that I recall, and only if it's significant. I will record my dreams in my DREAM JOURNAL. It'll be easy to switch from my SOUL WRITING folder and my DREAM JOURNAL folder, since they're both Word documents.
c. Soul Writing, a new Word folder.
That's the plan, Stan. I'll do it today, and will copy yesterday's SOUL WRITING to the folder as my first day. Today is my 2nd day.
Fine, that's settled. I have all day today. I doubt I'll write all day, but I will try to give it "30 pages" like the author did (Janet Conner, whose book "Writing Down Your Soul" has inspired all this).
Hmmmm, when I read her first chapter, I had the thought that I should re-read it every day, to get her message better.
It's a good idea, but might get in the way of the real SOUL WRITING, so I'll do it today, but might not do it EVERY day. It depends on how it goes.
And here...we...go!
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
DAY 1 - SOUL WRITING
20131119
Early this morning, on KFI, I heard a woman talking about "soul writing." She said it was NOT "automatic writing" and differientiated the two by saying "soul writing" comes after meditation, and from within the soul, while "automatic writing" comes from an outside source, and is generally not beneficial to the person writing (I'm not totally sure she said that last thing - I was half asleep at the time).
Anyway, today I'm going to NOT follow any one person's website about it. I'm going to go with what I feel might be an avenue out of my current dilemma (depression & anxiety about life in general). I'm going to just plow forward with whatever might become today's experience in my life.
Plan:
1. Meditate for 30 minutes, even if I fall asleep
2. Begin writing, and hopefully observing that it's from my SOUL, and not from some outside source.
Thought:
This could very well be a better solution than any I've tried before. We shall see. I will break from this note about my plan, and title the section "SOUL WRITING" below.
*******
Soul Writing (7:15am)
Amazingly, the meditation went very well. I was able to recall (after NOT being able to recall for a while) the name of the "app" that David Timpson had recommended for playing music - SPOTIFY - and I recalled it by sort of forcing my brain to remember. I knew it began with an "s" and then I went through the possible letters that could be 2nd letters, and I settled on "p" as the most likely. Then I went to vowels, and when I got to "o" the name came to me. I was quite pleased with myself for "forcing" my brain to recall "SPOTIFY" and it was a great result, since I then used SPOTIFY to provide the music for my meditation.
I meditated for about an hour, but kept reminding myself that the exact time did not matter. I only wanted to experience a fairly substantial "chunk" of meditation time. I prepared my room by closing the window & blinds, and lighting two white candles above my head. I positioned my ear buds & connected them to my iPhone, and started "Meditation" - and it was perfect.
My thoughts turned to childhood, to my negative experience with Guide Technologies, and then to the deep-seated propensity (or is it a need) to deceive myself and others. Whether that is useful or not, I don't know. But I do know that it seems to me to be the sort of "root cause" of all the negative living I've experienced over my life. In other words, had I NOT been inclined to lie, I might have been a very different - and better - person. But now, at least, I can admit the truth about my lying, and I'm not afraid of the consequences. I could - right now, anyway - tell my own two children that I have always been a liar on some level.
To remember how pervasive this is, I will record here the conversation I had yesterday with Anthony Guthmiller on the phone. I called him regarding my upcoming meeting at Wells Fargo Bank with Jonathan Weedman, a VP of Corporate Donations at the bank, and a gay man. We (Andy Sacher and I) were going to meet him today to discuss their possible donations to The Lavender Effect. So, I had called Anthony to get a few last minute pieces of advice on how we should handle our meeting with Jonathan. He was not in, so I left a voice mail message. A little later in the morning, I received a call from Jonathan, saying he had to cancel our meeting due to his illness. I was SO disappointed. We'd been planning this meeting and looking forward to it for several months, and now I was fairly sure we wouldn't be able to reschedule anything anytime soon with Jonathan, given how busy he is and how he now would be "behind" due to his illness. (BIG *SIGH*) So, around noon, I received a call back from Anthony. I told him that we were going to meet with Jonathan "tomorrow" (it's now "today"), and I wondered if he could give us any advice on our meeting.
LIE: I did not tell Anthony that our meeting had already been cancelled. I let him believe it was still going to happen, even though I knew it would not.
LIE: I told Anthony that the meeting MIGHT be cancelled since Jonathan had called and was sick, but that it was possible it could still take place.
WHY did I do that? I don't know, unless it's because I somehow "have to" deceive. It makes very little sense to me now, to have done that. But I did.
So, my conversation with Anthony continued, and he advised me to show up for the appointment, even if Jonathan did not. This would show how dedicated & serious we are to work with Jonathan. Of course, I knew as he and I spoke that we would not be going to the appointment at all. But I let him think that we would possibly still go & impress Jonathan..... all the while knowing that we were not going to go at all.
So, the consequence of my lying like this to Anthony is that he and Jonathan (being friends) might talk about my conversations with each of them, and they might realize that I had lied to Anthony.
I have NO REASON to lie about this. But I did. And now I MIGHT have an awkward consequence as a result. I.e., Jonathan could possibly confront me later, and ask, "Why did you tell Anthony that we might still meet at the original time, when I told you that we could not?"
The answer to that question is complex. It might be because I have a deep-seated need/propensity to lie. But there is also a practical reason. I wanted Anthony to give me as much information as possible during the conversation. I wasn't sure how available Anthony is, and I had him on the phone. So..... I sort of "pumped" him for information, and manipulated (i.e. lied) the conversation so that I could get as much info as possible.
It is HIGHLY likely that I will not have to answer for my lying in this case. It's a milky, merky, gray area that is probably not significant enough to dwell on for too long.
But I still lied. And I still HATE that I'm a liar.
So, (hopefully) putting this awkward situation to rest, I will simply know, having analyzed it "to death," that I have that tendency (to lie), and that I don't like it, and that I hope I'll avoid doing it (i.e. NOT DO IT) the next time the "opportunity" to do so arises.
*sigh*
I do hope that writing it all down, and relentlessly adhering to the truth, will serve some purpose for me.
So, my "SOUL WRITING" led me to address my deepest (as far as I know, it's the deepest) character flaw of my life: The tendency to lie.
It's ironic that this should be the case. I've been told by several somewhat close friends that I'm an honest person - more so than others in their lives.
And yet, I've lied about my very being - to myself and others - to the point of distorting my true self. E.g., I've pretended to be a straight male since my earliest memory. I've pretended to be an honest person. Now on some levels, I HAVE BEEN an honest person. Others might say that yes, I AM, and I believe they'd say that, at least in part, because I've made a generally conscious and concerted effort to be honest. I no longer pretend - to ANYone - that I'm a straight male. And along with that, I've learned over several years how to tell the truth. I do it on the website exmormon.org. And I'm doing it here.
I'm no longer afraid of who might read this, and of what they might think.
In the past, I would not have been so frank since I would think, "What if my son or granddaughter ever reads this?" And I would think, "I can remember who I and and what I've done to a sufficient degree, that I don't have to write everything down."
The GAs of the LD$ church advise the membership to keep journals. But now I find out that many of them don't keep journals. I'm wondering why, but I speculate that it's because if they they did record their activities and thoughts, they'd be forced to put into writing the lies that they are living.
My experience with the LD$ church is enigmatic. It seems to be false on almost every level. And yet it also seems to be a valid way of life. At this point in MY life, however, it is no longer a "valid way of life." It's a fraud. I can't go back to it, knowing what I know.
***
I wish I could have written more that is definitively "SOUL WRITING." Doing the meditation before was a positive experience. Perhaps it led me to write what I've written. Perhaps not. Either way, I feel a little better now, than I did during the night as I lapsed in and out of sleep.
I don't know if I'll try this again, but I'd like to. I'd like to really move from the space I'm in, to a better one. I hope I'll do it, because I sense that there is a whole lot more for me to SOUL WRITE about. And it would be a shame to not pursue it at least for one more "session" or one more day.
Early this morning, on KFI, I heard a woman talking about "soul writing." She said it was NOT "automatic writing" and differientiated the two by saying "soul writing" comes after meditation, and from within the soul, while "automatic writing" comes from an outside source, and is generally not beneficial to the person writing (I'm not totally sure she said that last thing - I was half asleep at the time).
Anyway, today I'm going to NOT follow any one person's website about it. I'm going to go with what I feel might be an avenue out of my current dilemma (depression & anxiety about life in general). I'm going to just plow forward with whatever might become today's experience in my life.
Plan:
1. Meditate for 30 minutes, even if I fall asleep
2. Begin writing, and hopefully observing that it's from my SOUL, and not from some outside source.
Thought:
This could very well be a better solution than any I've tried before. We shall see. I will break from this note about my plan, and title the section "SOUL WRITING" below.
*******
Soul Writing (7:15am)
Amazingly, the meditation went very well. I was able to recall (after NOT being able to recall for a while) the name of the "app" that David Timpson had recommended for playing music - SPOTIFY - and I recalled it by sort of forcing my brain to remember. I knew it began with an "s" and then I went through the possible letters that could be 2nd letters, and I settled on "p" as the most likely. Then I went to vowels, and when I got to "o" the name came to me. I was quite pleased with myself for "forcing" my brain to recall "SPOTIFY" and it was a great result, since I then used SPOTIFY to provide the music for my meditation.
I meditated for about an hour, but kept reminding myself that the exact time did not matter. I only wanted to experience a fairly substantial "chunk" of meditation time. I prepared my room by closing the window & blinds, and lighting two white candles above my head. I positioned my ear buds & connected them to my iPhone, and started "Meditation" - and it was perfect.
My thoughts turned to childhood, to my negative experience with Guide Technologies, and then to the deep-seated propensity (or is it a need) to deceive myself and others. Whether that is useful or not, I don't know. But I do know that it seems to me to be the sort of "root cause" of all the negative living I've experienced over my life. In other words, had I NOT been inclined to lie, I might have been a very different - and better - person. But now, at least, I can admit the truth about my lying, and I'm not afraid of the consequences. I could - right now, anyway - tell my own two children that I have always been a liar on some level.
To remember how pervasive this is, I will record here the conversation I had yesterday with Anthony Guthmiller on the phone. I called him regarding my upcoming meeting at Wells Fargo Bank with Jonathan Weedman, a VP of Corporate Donations at the bank, and a gay man. We (Andy Sacher and I) were going to meet him today to discuss their possible donations to The Lavender Effect. So, I had called Anthony to get a few last minute pieces of advice on how we should handle our meeting with Jonathan. He was not in, so I left a voice mail message. A little later in the morning, I received a call from Jonathan, saying he had to cancel our meeting due to his illness. I was SO disappointed. We'd been planning this meeting and looking forward to it for several months, and now I was fairly sure we wouldn't be able to reschedule anything anytime soon with Jonathan, given how busy he is and how he now would be "behind" due to his illness. (BIG *SIGH*) So, around noon, I received a call back from Anthony. I told him that we were going to meet with Jonathan "tomorrow" (it's now "today"), and I wondered if he could give us any advice on our meeting.
LIE: I did not tell Anthony that our meeting had already been cancelled. I let him believe it was still going to happen, even though I knew it would not.
LIE: I told Anthony that the meeting MIGHT be cancelled since Jonathan had called and was sick, but that it was possible it could still take place.
WHY did I do that? I don't know, unless it's because I somehow "have to" deceive. It makes very little sense to me now, to have done that. But I did.
So, my conversation with Anthony continued, and he advised me to show up for the appointment, even if Jonathan did not. This would show how dedicated & serious we are to work with Jonathan. Of course, I knew as he and I spoke that we would not be going to the appointment at all. But I let him think that we would possibly still go & impress Jonathan..... all the while knowing that we were not going to go at all.
So, the consequence of my lying like this to Anthony is that he and Jonathan (being friends) might talk about my conversations with each of them, and they might realize that I had lied to Anthony.
I have NO REASON to lie about this. But I did. And now I MIGHT have an awkward consequence as a result. I.e., Jonathan could possibly confront me later, and ask, "Why did you tell Anthony that we might still meet at the original time, when I told you that we could not?"
The answer to that question is complex. It might be because I have a deep-seated need/propensity to lie. But there is also a practical reason. I wanted Anthony to give me as much information as possible during the conversation. I wasn't sure how available Anthony is, and I had him on the phone. So..... I sort of "pumped" him for information, and manipulated (i.e. lied) the conversation so that I could get as much info as possible.
It is HIGHLY likely that I will not have to answer for my lying in this case. It's a milky, merky, gray area that is probably not significant enough to dwell on for too long.
But I still lied. And I still HATE that I'm a liar.
So, (hopefully) putting this awkward situation to rest, I will simply know, having analyzed it "to death," that I have that tendency (to lie), and that I don't like it, and that I hope I'll avoid doing it (i.e. NOT DO IT) the next time the "opportunity" to do so arises.
*sigh*
I do hope that writing it all down, and relentlessly adhering to the truth, will serve some purpose for me.
So, my "SOUL WRITING" led me to address my deepest (as far as I know, it's the deepest) character flaw of my life: The tendency to lie.
It's ironic that this should be the case. I've been told by several somewhat close friends that I'm an honest person - more so than others in their lives.
And yet, I've lied about my very being - to myself and others - to the point of distorting my true self. E.g., I've pretended to be a straight male since my earliest memory. I've pretended to be an honest person. Now on some levels, I HAVE BEEN an honest person. Others might say that yes, I AM, and I believe they'd say that, at least in part, because I've made a generally conscious and concerted effort to be honest. I no longer pretend - to ANYone - that I'm a straight male. And along with that, I've learned over several years how to tell the truth. I do it on the website exmormon.org. And I'm doing it here.
I'm no longer afraid of who might read this, and of what they might think.
In the past, I would not have been so frank since I would think, "What if my son or granddaughter ever reads this?" And I would think, "I can remember who I and and what I've done to a sufficient degree, that I don't have to write everything down."
The GAs of the LD$ church advise the membership to keep journals. But now I find out that many of them don't keep journals. I'm wondering why, but I speculate that it's because if they they did record their activities and thoughts, they'd be forced to put into writing the lies that they are living.
My experience with the LD$ church is enigmatic. It seems to be false on almost every level. And yet it also seems to be a valid way of life. At this point in MY life, however, it is no longer a "valid way of life." It's a fraud. I can't go back to it, knowing what I know.
***
I wish I could have written more that is definitively "SOUL WRITING." Doing the meditation before was a positive experience. Perhaps it led me to write what I've written. Perhaps not. Either way, I feel a little better now, than I did during the night as I lapsed in and out of sleep.
I don't know if I'll try this again, but I'd like to. I'd like to really move from the space I'm in, to a better one. I hope I'll do it, because I sense that there is a whole lot more for me to SOUL WRITE about. And it would be a shame to not pursue it at least for one more "session" or one more day.
Wednesday, November 6, 2013
A RUN OF DREAMS, and STORIES TO TELL
20131106
I've had some poignant dreams, and I don't know what to think about them, or what to think about how I've remembered them, or recorded them, or forgotten them.......
If what I call my "awake hours" are actually a dream, as David T and others claim, and if what I call my "asleep hours" are actually my reality, then what I call "dreaming" is reality. And I'm recording all these thoughts while asleep.
BIG *sigh*
But whatever. If I back up any farther, I'll fall into embryonicism - HA! - and there will be even less meaning to "this" than there now is.
But so what? If this is a dream, then it's less important than my "asleep" hours are. Or is it?
DOUBLE BIG *sigh*
There can be no definitive answer when you question everything, can there? No.
Last night I attended a session at Abacus (an invited guest of Barrett Porter), and the speaker was Robert Dickman, who spoke about how to tell stories. And with a partner, I told a story that I'd hardly ever thought about since it happened in December, 1966 (47 years ago). And yet, as I concluded the story, I teared up about what had happened way back then. Amazing to me, since it was all unplanned, and the "message" or "moral" of my story was something I had not EVER thought of before - not even once.
Perhaps I should adopt a new "habit" or "approach" to my life: tell stories about what happened to me, and tell them well, and know that I can be candid about ALL my past, and not worry about who might think what.... etc.
Stories from
* Great Falls Road
* Mexico
* Rockville, MD
* Vienna
* Montreal
- CHRISTMAS 1966
etc.
I have the thought that I could write stories here, about aspects of my life that my children haven't known about. Similar to my mom revealing one day in Vienna that she'd finished her High School in Washington DC, not Richfield, UT, as we had always thought. There are little stories, like CHRISTMAS 1966 that will likely be of interest to my children.
And now that I can be openly gay, I can write MUCH more freely! YAY!
I hope I keep this momentum going. So much of my life is punctuated by distractions (eating, sex, "have to's," the internet, sleepiness, etc) .... that I don't always complete projects like this. Story of my life.
HAHA. Maybe THAT should be the first Story I tell.
"Take 10 with PapaKen"
DAMMIT - I don't remember the other word(s) that rhyme with "PapaKen" - but it was a title for a story... stoopid brain! Oh well........
End of post.
O & O
BAH
I've had some poignant dreams, and I don't know what to think about them, or what to think about how I've remembered them, or recorded them, or forgotten them.......
If what I call my "awake hours" are actually a dream, as David T and others claim, and if what I call my "asleep hours" are actually my reality, then what I call "dreaming" is reality. And I'm recording all these thoughts while asleep.
BIG *sigh*
But whatever. If I back up any farther, I'll fall into embryonicism - HA! - and there will be even less meaning to "this" than there now is.
But so what? If this is a dream, then it's less important than my "asleep" hours are. Or is it?
DOUBLE BIG *sigh*
There can be no definitive answer when you question everything, can there? No.
Last night I attended a session at Abacus (an invited guest of Barrett Porter), and the speaker was Robert Dickman, who spoke about how to tell stories. And with a partner, I told a story that I'd hardly ever thought about since it happened in December, 1966 (47 years ago). And yet, as I concluded the story, I teared up about what had happened way back then. Amazing to me, since it was all unplanned, and the "message" or "moral" of my story was something I had not EVER thought of before - not even once.
Perhaps I should adopt a new "habit" or "approach" to my life: tell stories about what happened to me, and tell them well, and know that I can be candid about ALL my past, and not worry about who might think what.... etc.
Stories from
* Great Falls Road
* Mexico
* Rockville, MD
* Vienna
* Montreal
- CHRISTMAS 1966
etc.
I have the thought that I could write stories here, about aspects of my life that my children haven't known about. Similar to my mom revealing one day in Vienna that she'd finished her High School in Washington DC, not Richfield, UT, as we had always thought. There are little stories, like CHRISTMAS 1966 that will likely be of interest to my children.
And now that I can be openly gay, I can write MUCH more freely! YAY!
I hope I keep this momentum going. So much of my life is punctuated by distractions (eating, sex, "have to's," the internet, sleepiness, etc) .... that I don't always complete projects like this. Story of my life.
HAHA. Maybe THAT should be the first Story I tell.
"Take 10 with PapaKen"
DAMMIT - I don't remember the other word(s) that rhyme with "PapaKen" - but it was a title for a story... stoopid brain! Oh well........
End of post.
O & O
BAH
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