20210226 SLLLAVERS for FRIDAY - DAY ? of DERA - TRYING TO GO ON WITH ROUTINE

Last night, I went to sleep early.... with my CPAP.  I slept well.  I woke only once.  I woke up for the day at around 6:30 AM, and although I was (am still not) 100% motivated to do it all, I decided to do one step, and commit only to the next one.  Like GG and I discussed the other day.  This approach is not new to me, but I usually don't need to use it.  Today, I did, and it worked, so far.

SILENCE

Tried to silence my brain, but it's not easy after I wake up and begin thinking about what today might bring.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

191.2  Yesterday's weight

191.6  Today's weight

+0.4

I visualize weighing less tomorrow.

EXERCISE

Did my full base-70 routine for Friday, February 26, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 70
2. toe/finger stretches 70
3. bicycle crunches 70
4. shoulder rolls 70
5. inversion table 2 1-min sets
6. EPLEY MANEUVER 1Ram
7. squats 35
8. push-ups 35

READING, WRITING

Read for 70 seconds in SAPIENS by Yuval Noah Harari.  He says empires have long succeed in "ruling" other conquered peoples/societies, and usually they absorb them and dilute them until they no longer exist.  Harari dismisses (at least for now) the idea that empires "should not dominate" as problematic.  He will now give examples.  (for next time)

Read for 70 seconds in YOU ARE A WRITER by Jeff Goins.  He says in order to ______ (succeed), I must establish myself as one who GIVES more than I ASK.  He gives examples of how to do this, among which are, for example, to GIVE free access to a book I've written in exchange for ASKing someone to read something I've written.  Always give more than I ask.  This will establish myself in the "society of writers" that I want to join and be a thriving member of.

Read for 1 page in A PROMISED LAND by Barack Obama.  He says that on a flight back to Chicago (I forget where he'd been - CA, I think), he experienced a dark mood and a turning point in his life.  Both personal and professional lives were strained, and he thought he'd become a failure at his career aspirations:  he'd become a "politician," and not a very good one at that.  He questioned his motives (ego, showing others up, etc.) which he'd erroneously thought were more pure, and directed in a more altruistic direction.  Next time, I'm sure, he'll explain how he got out of this funk.

**********

Well, David, Michael and I are awaiting the arrival of the official Corporate Offer from the Danes, buying David's mine.  I'm tempted to say, "Here we are again."

But let's wait and see.  They said "by the end of February," and it's only the 26th.

Still, *sigh*

20210223 EVERYTHING'S FALLING APART - AGAIN!!

 A week ago, David called to say the day had arrived - D-DAY.  And I believed him.

But now, a week later, still no written offer on the mine.

And still no Turn To funding (from Michael).

And now.......

Joe's testing positive for COVID19.

This is f****d!

20210219 SLLLAVERS for FRIDAY - DAY 7 of D-ERA!!!!

SILENCE

Tried to silence my brain for 70 seconds.  Moderate success.

LLL

Live.  Laugh.  Love.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

192.2  Today's weight

194.0  Yesterday's weight

-1.8

I visualize weighing less tomorrow

EXERCISE

Did my full base-70 routine for Friday, February 19, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 70
2. toe/finger stretches 70
3. bicycle crunches 70
4. shoulder rolls 70
5. inversion table 2 1-min sets.
6. EPLEY MANEUVER 1Ram
7. squats 35
8. push-ups 35

READING, WRITING

Read 70 seconds in SAPIENS by Yuval Noah Harari.  He says size does/did not matter;  many empires of old were small, and were able to steamroll over their conquered polities with force or superiority or both.

Ultimately, for earlier empires, size DID matter.  They steamrolled over numerous SMALLER states, and obliterated much of their culture.  (Here Yuval has contradicted himself.)

Empires and their colonial efforts are responsible for wiping out many smaller cultures, mostly keeping only the land and the people. 

Read 70 seconds in YOU ARE A WRITER by Jeff Goins.  He says that no one will pay any attention to me unless/until I build trust with them (my future fans).  I am the salesperson in the store, and the fan is a person who comes in and says, "No thanks.  I'm just looking."  I must be overly generous and give them something, and they they'll earn my trust.

Makes sense.  Now I have to decide what I can give.  I've done something similar to closeted gay men, who were cautious about coming out;  I gave them free time and advice, and eventually they began to trust me.  One even wanted to pay me!  (I refused.)

Read 70 seconds in A PROMISED LAND by Barack Obama.  He recounts a sequence of Lincolnesque failures as he strove to make a name for himself in Illinois politics; he lost the congressional race, and as consolation, he went to LA for the DNational Convention, but couldn't get in.  Back home, he left his wife with a sick baby.

Considering where he ended up, these stories are humorous, and yet speak seriously about the need to be persistent when confronted with set-backs and failures.

**********

Yesterday, David emailed that Michael said that they expect to have the Corporate Offer Letter (?) in hand this morning.  I have not heard anything yet.

My enemy is silence.  Silence from David/Michael.  It makes me lapse into doubt.  But I will again wait until I hear from David.  I think it WILL happen, and David will be jubilant about it.

We'll see.

20210218 SLLLAVERS for THURSDAY - DAY 6 - D-ERA CONTINUES!!

 (I'm not sure why the last few days disappeared - maybe I lost them, but maybe I didn't)

(I didn't; they were just not visible for a few minutes - the mysteries of computers)

SILENCE

Tried

LLL

Live.  Love.  Laugh.

AFFIRMATIONS

I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

VISUALIZATION

194.0  Today's weight

197.0  Yesterday's weight

(go figure)

I visualize weighing less tomorrow.

EXERCISE

In-bed exercises only; I'm kinda tired, and also afraid of doing too much - until tomorrow.

1. ankle/wrist circles 21
2. toe/finger stretches 21

nothing more today

READING, WRITING

No reading - yet.  Maybe later today.

20210217 SLLLAVERS for WEDNESDAY - DAY 5 of the D-ERA (- I hope!!)

SILENCE

Tried to silence my brain for 70 seconds.  Not too successful, since I'm approx. 22 hours into the 48 hour period after my 2nd Pfizer Covid19 vaccine.  I'm watching for side effects, and so far, I have a mildly sore arm, and possibly a slight fever, and possibly slight muscle acheyness. I would add "slight headache" (and I do have one), but I often have slight to medium headaches when I get up. I'm not taking any pain meds.... yet.

LLL

Live.  Love.  Laugh.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

197.0  Today's weight

196.2  Yesterday's weight

+0.8

I visualize weighing less tomorrow.

EXERCISE

Did a modified routine for Wednesday, February 17, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 14
2. toe/finger stretches 14
3. half bicycle crunches (legs only) 14
4. shoulder rolls -0-
5. inversion table -0-
6. EPLEY MANEUVER -0-
7. squats -0-
8. push-ups -0-

(this was due to my COVID19 2nd dose vaccination; I'd really rather not push it)

READING, WRITING

TBD; maybe later today

**********

I'm wondering why I haven't heard anything from David; he said he'd have a written offer this week, and now it's Wednesday; I guess it's not a priority for some reason.

Today's the twins 14th birthday; I hope they received my BD cards.  I'll call them later.

20210216 SLLLAVERS for TUESDAY - DAY 4 of the D-DAY ERA!!!!!!!!

SILENCE

Tried to silence my brain for 70 seconds.  Meh.

LLL

Live.  Laugh.  Love.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

196.2  Today's weight

196.4  Yesterday's weight

-0.2

I visualize weighing less tomorrow

EXERCISE

Did my full base-70 routine for Tuesday, February 16, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 70
2. toe/finger stretches 70
3. bicycle crunches 70
4. shoulder rolls 70
5. inversion table 2 1-min sets
6. EPLEY MANEUVER 1Ram
7. squats 35
8. push-ups 35

READING, WRITING

Read for 70 seconds in SAPIENS by Yuval Noah Harari.  He says cultural diversity and territorial flexibility are the two factors that define an "empire."  Not necessarily conquests, or even methods of government/control.  E.g., British Empire grew, in part, through strategic marriages.

Read for 70 seconds in YOU ARE A WRITER by Jeff Goins.  He says I need to start creating inroads and communication channels.  How do I do that?  I ask for it.  (Although I haven't read the section "How Do I Ask For Permission?" - I'm guessing that he'll say something like, "Post a piece, and then notify my friends/family/acquaintances about it, and then ask them to read it, and ask them to give me feedback about what they read."  We'll see tomorrow, or when I take up my routine again.

**********

The reason I wrote "we'll see tomorrow, or when I take up my routine again" is because today I'll get my 2nd COVID19 vaccine dose, and I'm anticipating that I MIGHT experience debilitating side effects.

**********

Read for 70 seconds in A PROMISED LAND by Barack Obama.  He says he made bad decisions about both his career and his family.  He in fact ignored the challenge his wife was giving him that she was "doing their job all alone," and he entered a Congressional race based on jerry-rigged polls.  Hmmm.  I can see how these decisions were "wrong," but were they also "right" in the long run?

*********

Let's change it from "D-DAY" to "D-ERA"

At 70, I do have memories.  "Gospelship" with David (versus "Friendship").  Affirmations.  Visiting properties in Dana Point (why did THAT memory come to me earlier this morning?).  Well, I could go on, but the memories I'd like to cultivate and enhance are the ones about what I've just read.

Soon I'll begin boning up/reading/studying about non-profits in the USA and abroad; about financial considerations when approving a grant.  And I need my mental faculty to be sharp and yes, Fred Cramer, even "crisp."

It will happen, but not without a concerted effort, based on organized and regular focus on the issues at hand.

Bill Gates' recent interviews (on 60 Minutes, and in the NYT (SWAY podcast)) lay out general "threads" (or silos, or directions, or _______ (there must be other terminology for this)) that we could follow in David's Foundation.

From the SWAY podcast on February 15, 2021, in which  Kara Swisher interviews Bill Gates:

B&MG Foundation

• WHO
• Malaria
• COVID vaccine
• Tech regulation
• Anti-trust
• Mark Zukerberg
• CLIMATE CHANGE  (gave Ted Talk in 2010)
• Electrify _______ (Africa)
• Created TerraPower, _____ Energy
• Software/Internet - unique domaine
• Medicine (saving children's lives in developing countries)
• CO2 control vis a vis energy development
• ZERO GREENHOUSE GAS EMISSIONS because this determines how much warmer the earth gets, weather changes, trees/forest burns..... CO2 shooting up.
• cant just focus on near-term goals - might be worse.
• Steel, cement, meat
• CARS are only 1/3 of the problem; 2/3 are "the hard stuff"
• GREEN PREMIUM - measure of how much doing something (e.g. fly private plane) costs.  For electric cars, green premium is going down.
• Energy consumption - in the US, we should reduce consumption.  But the undeveloped world uses hardly any at all.  So we need to EQUALIZE energy consumption......the goal is "ZERO"

20210215 SLLLAVERS for MONDAY - PRESIDENT'S DAY and ANOTHER D-DAY ERA!!!!!!

SILENCE

Tried to silence my thoughts for 70 seconds; mild success.

LLL

Live.  Love.  Laugh.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

196.4  Today's weight

196.6  Yesterday's weight

-  0.2

I visualize weighing less tomorrow

EXERCISE

Did my full base-70 routine for Monday, February 15, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 70
2. toe/finger stretches 70
3. bicycle crunches 70
4. shoulder rolls 70
5. inversion table 2 1-min sets
6. EPLEY MANEUVER 1Ram
7. squats 35
8. push-ups 35

READING, WRITING

Read 70 seconds in SAPIENS by Yuval Noah Harari.  He says that as our species/society has evolved, Empires have grown up, expanded, and later died.  He defines an Empire as 1)  an entity having sufficient control over a group (2-3 is not enough, but 20-30 is enough; the "threshhold" of becoming an Empire lies somewhere in between).  and 2)  the groups being controlled must differ in government & culture.  He points out that 100 years ago, the British Empire could have been expanded quite easily, but not today.

Read 70 seconds in YOU ARE A WRITER by Jeff Goins.  He says, and I quote:

MEANINGFUL  The listener must care about what you're sharing.  You must have permission and attention.

MUTUAL  Both parties need to be in on it.  One party may benefit more than the other, but it cannot be completely one-sided.

MATTER  Not only must both sides care about the content, but there needs to be fruit.  Something good must result from the connection.

This is the hard part of trying to get noticed for communicating a message.  It's the part most writers neglect.  They get scared or lazy.  They procrastinate delay the inevitable.  Or they get excited about sharing their art and rush the process.  They get pushy and burn bridges.

Either way they wonder why nobody pays attention to what they have to say, (and they wonder) why they're virtually anonymous.

**  I note above that Goins has included 2 terms that I've applied to myself over the years:  "lazy" and "procrastinate."  This makes me wonder if, when I finally get serious about applying the principles of writing in this book, and I actually begin the process, that my life-long laziness and my tendency to procrastinate, will be hurdles that I'll have to clear on my road to success as a writer.  On vera.

Read 70 seconds in A PROMISED LAND by Barack Obama.  He says his life with Michelle was blissful for the 3 months after their first daughter was born; I compare the time when I was a new father, and held Joseph in my arms.  I am very mindful that I do not have such a detailed recollection of Joseph's first 3 months of life, as Barack has of his new young family.  But I DO recall the time, and the feelings of awe I had as I looked at Joe while he made newborn noises, and often opened his mouth, seemingly looking for food as he turned his head.  Those were the precious moments for me, a new father.

*********

Last week, David said he and Michael would be working on a document which would entail an offer of employment, along with details about compensation.  I might possibly be able to use this to obtain refinancing on my house; David says I can expect it this week, possibly Monday or Tuesday.

Today is President's Day, so it won't likely happen today.  This is a "small wait" compared to the 6 year wait we've had up until now.

I'm a bit trouble by my own internal priority thinking.  If, as DT told me, there is a rather large amount of money coming my way eventually, I will necessarily have to decide how to spend it.  And the thoughts coming to me since February 12 (the day I'm labeling "D-DAY") and not all selfless and giving.

I don't really apologize to my better self for this; I think some of the personal and "finally I can...." things on my list will be helpful for my sanity and well-being.  So I can move on from that.

But I want to be careful to balance my prioritizations between "for others" and "for me."

What the heck??  There's no money yet.  And I'm used to delays and changes......

So today I'll paint the kitchen cabinets, and maybe make a run to Costco to use up my "reward" money:

1.  Metamucil

1.5.  Lowdose aspirin

2.  Blueberries

3.  Laundry detergent

4.  Pineapple

5.  

20210214 SLLLAVERS for SUNDAY - THE ERA OF D-DAY IS ONGOING!!!!!!!!!!!

D-DAY ERA!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!

SILENCE

Tried to silence my brain for 70 seconds; mild success.  But I noted that sometimes I am aware that I'm trying to do this, and allow myself the focus of counting the seconds.  And at other times, I get lost in "distraction thoughts" and then bring my attention back to the process of silencing my brain.  Either way, I have not emptied my brain completely of any thoughts; I'll keep trying.

LLL

Love.  Laugh.  Live.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also, said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

196.6  Today's weight.

I visualize weighing less tomorrow.

EXERCISE

I did my full base-70 routine for Sunday, February 14, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 70
2. toe/finger stretches 70
3. bicycle crunches 70
4. shoulder rolls 70
5. EPLEY MANUEVER 1Ram
6. squats 35
7. push-ups 35

READING, WRITING

Read 70 seconds in SAPIENS by Yuval Noah Harari.  He says ancient Numantians were vanquished by Rome, and all that is left of them are the ruins at Numantia, and the legacy depicted in comic books of today's Spanish young people.  Spain has adopted almost everything Roman (religion, cuisine, language).

Read 70 seconds in YOU ARE A WRITER by Jeff Goins.  He says that in our day (of technologically enhanced communication), we must localize.  He's hinting that a writer today should not envision a world-wide blockbuster book right up front.  Rather, s/he should focus on small, more local groups where there must be these three elements:  Meaningful content, Mutual benefit, and Matter - it must MATTER to both parties (me, and my readers).

Yes.

Read 70 seconds in A PROMISED LAND by Barack Obama.  He says that his beginning period of life in Illinois politics was pretty dismal because he could not attract enough attention to "make a difference," no matter how well-intentionned he was.  Advice from colleagues was "don't beat your head against a wall," and that he should indulge in the horse trading of traditional politics to get his goals met.  But then family life began to pull him away.

**************

I need to write about my new life which began on Friday, February 12, 2021:

Today is Valentine's Day, and it began with having slept well for about 8 hours, and that is longer than.  I anticipated beginning another streak of keeping up with my daily routine.  I woke at about 7am, and began with an attempt at silencing my brain.  But some text messages interrupted me (they were from Lisa, Joe, and Teresa), and I replied to a few.  And as is often the case, George chimed in with his pre-date Valentine's Day wishes.

Somewhere in that process, I remembered dreaming about my former boss (Fred Crammer) who confronted me with the accusation that there was a picture of my penis in some public forum.  I decided in that moment to admit it, and he was at a loss for words; I moved on, however possible that is in a dream.

Later reflections included that I have recently dreamed of other former bosses (Joe Pruiitt, Ed Ross, and Jeff Dixon (now deceased).  I am trying to figure out if such dreams are my effort to bring closure to my earlier life, and to prepare myself for what is to come with David's Foundation (I wonder what he'll name it, if he hasn't already chosen a name).

So, I feel some sort of need to write about what is happening in my life right now.  So I'll begin with some random thoughts & ideas & concerns:

• Professional preparation for my duties as "Chief of Humanitarian Division" of David's Foundation.  I feel the need to "bone up" and also learn new skills for this responsibility
• Since I'm still in the "before" stage of this new chapter, I feel the need to be careful not to overspend before the "ship comes in."
• Things that come to mind which will now be different:  make a list.

List of things:

1. I feel cramped where I live; I could possibly find a larger place, or ask Chad to move out.
2. I might want to move to OC (Irvine, or somewhere close to there) to be closer to an airport and to the Ashtons.
3. I'd like to make a sizable contribution to The Lavender Effect (if it's still a viable entity)
4. I'd lie to get a massage from Clarence (if he still does them)
5. I'd like to plan a trip to see

a.  Marie

b.  Eric

c.  George

d.  Patricia

e.  Peggy

f.  People in the Bay Area

g.  Australia

h.  Prague

i.  Japan 

 

 

 

(tbc)

List, cont'd.

1. I'd like to set up trust-funds for children/grandchildren
2. I'd like to hire a personal trainer again.
3. I'd like to have my teeth whitened
4. I'd like to get a new phone
5. 
   

I want to help people in need:

TBC......

20210212 D DAY D DAY D DAY D DAY D DAY D DAY!!!!!

 I can't sleep.

David called me today (well, now it's 20210213), but since I haven't slept yet, it's still

D DAY, FEBRUARY 12, 2021

It's very hard to believe that the day has finally arrived.

But it HAS!!!!!!!

And now begins the beginning of the rest of my life.

Wow - it's amazing.

I am so stoked!  Psyched!  Jazzed!

Can't wait to see what tomorrow will bring.

20210209 SLLLAVERS for TUESDAY - ANOTHER, VERY POSSIBLE, D-DAY

SILENCE

Tried to silence my brain for 70 seconds.

LLL

Live.  Love.  Laugh.

AFFIRMATIONS

1. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
2. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
3. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
4. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
5. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
6. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
7. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
8. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
9. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.
10. I, Ken Taylor, am a loving human being.

Also said aloud for 70 seconds.

VISUALIZATION

197.6  Today's weight

198.6  Yesterday's weight

-1.0

I visualize weighing less tomorrow.

EXERCISE

Did my full base-70 routine for Tuesday, February 9, 2021:

1. ankle/wrist circles 70
2. toe/finger stretches 70
3. bicycle crunches 70
4. shoulder rolls 70
5. inversion table 2 1-min sets
6. EPLEY MANUVEUR 1Ram
7. squats 35
8. push-ups 35

READING, WRITING

Read 70 seconds in SAPIENS by Yuval Noah Harari.  He says, I think, that the fall of the Roman Empire began when X sent 30,000 troops to Y to surround them until they starved to death, or killed themselves, rather than becoming Roman slaves.

Read 70 seconds in YOU ARE A WRITER by Jeff Goins.  He says a brand and a voice are not enough for becoming a successful.  You also need channel(s) of communication with readers.  You need MARKETING.

Read 70 seconds in A PROMISED LAND by Barack Obama.  He says politics in Illinois, were he cut his teeth, taught him that VOTING and AGREEING can be 2 different things, in spite of "right or wrong" and in spite of long, excellent speeches.  Most political activity goes on without 90% of the people knowing about it.