WAR

(watching ROOTS final episode)

I hate war.  Oh My GOD how I hate war.

I've never been in it.  But GOD how I hate war.

I don't deserve to be free, but GOD how I HATE war.

I don't know much about nothin', but GOD HOW I HATE WAR!

I HATE IT!

Reunion of family, thought possibly lost, is sweet.

But made sweet by that bastard WAR!

WHY must we do that?  We ought to outgrow it.

I thought we might have, once there were nuclear weapons.

And I thought so again when George HW Bush found a way to achieve a victory WITHOUT fighting.

Is fignting in our blood?  Killing?

I hope not.  I PRAY not.

I long for a peaceful society in which we can build each other up.

Not kill.

Neither my father nor my mother fought.  But their sons Dan and Tom and Jack wore US military uniforms.  Only Dan actually fought in a war.

But Bob, Kathy, Peggy, Millie and I did NOT fight.  We didn't wear military uniforms.  We just enjoy the freedoms defended and/or fought for by our brothers.

I'm feeling guilty for not having served/fought.  And I'm ashamed and devastated by what my ancestral white peers did to Blacks and Indians.  There is no justification for any of it.

NONE.

I used to think of myself as a soldier in the army of God.  But what a laugh that is now.  I was as green as they come, and never learned anything of value about "fighting" for a cause.  What a waste.  I was never any kind of soldier.

I just enjoy the freedoms fought for by Dan and others.

What a shameful life.

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To a newborn, being held up to the stars at night:  "Take a look at the ONLY THING GREATER THAN YOU!"